/the dark cow of mystery\ The heat of the night breaks with the mornings first light. The sin and evil of the dark disappears with a flash of color as the sun crests the Wasatch mountains. Today I woke an old friend, and i met a new one, and i kissed a silly one. I saw Camile, too. I've seen too many movies lately. In the past week i've watched Seven Samurai, The Hidden Fortress, Tears of the Sun, X-2, and Daredevil. I think i have a problem. I think i will stop, right after the final LofR comes out. For the most part i liked them all, though daredevil really isn't worth jackshit and Hidden Fortress and 7 Samurai are long and try my six second patience.
/the dark cow of mystery\ " i just flipped off president george Today there was no graduation practice. Not a minute of it, which is great considering they wasted my time for six hours(total) on monday and tuesday, plus the four hours of baccalaureate crap that we did last night. Tommorrow, how ever, i have three hours of practice followed on friday by six hours of practice, followed by three hours of graduation. OI! and the parents say that this will be on of my most remembered moments. THEY said the same about senior prom, and the whole senior year, but i think that the wedding was much more entertaining than the prom and my senior year will be remebered only for being painful and lonely. I hate being alone in a crowd. The parents are insisting on a graduation present for me and i have been mulling around a few thoughts. One is for a portable mp3 player, another a box of star trek cards(they both have the same value in the long run), or finally a GPS thing-y. I went shopping around for an mp3 player today and i've decided that most electronics store managers haven't figured out yet that the vacuum tube went out in the sixties. Case in point: at curcuit city, they have the portable mp3 players in the home electronics section, not next to other portable audio devices, or even portable video devices, or even next to home mp3 players(which indeed do exist), but rather by the home accessories. Another case: Future city has their mp3 players not in the portable music section, but rather by the video cameras. It took fifteen minutes to find them at either store, with help of an employee at each. Not even some sort of sadistic plot to maximize the amount of time people spend in a store could explain making things that hidden.
/the dark cow of mystery\ tommorrow belle's canyon is mine. Like a bolt from the blue, descending from the sky My brain collapses in the dead of night Too much for my psyche, another crack-up If you're awake, join me All the things you see, the same as what I see We listen to the sound of nervous breakdown A death that blends with a will to live One of the things that freaks me out I'm waiting for a sign, have to leave this place behind Where no one knows my name Then later we'll calm down, we'll both break down and cry (And say) our last goodbye... I'll break the chains, I'm out of line I'm living on my nerve, last days of ninety-nine Nightmare, conspiracy, depression and lunacy I need to feel, walled up inside Locked up, messed up, maybe there is no tomorrow All this thinking does me no good I'll miss you my love, but it's about time that this world goes up in flames- Apoptygma Berzerk I feel so extraordinary Something's got a hold on me I get this feeling I'm in motion A sudden sense of liberty I don't care 'cause I'm not there And I don't care if I'm here tomorrow Again and again I've taken too much Of the things that cost you too much I used to think that the day would never come I'd see delight in the shade of the morning sun My morning sun is the drug that brings me near To the childhood I lost, replaced by fear I used to think that the day would never come That my life would depend on the morning sun... When I was a very small boy, Very small boys talked to me Now that we've grown up together They're afraid of what they see That's the price that we all pay Our valued destiny comes to nothing I can't tell you where we're going I guess there was just no way of knowing I used to think that the day would never come I'd see delight in the shade of the morning sun My morning sun is the drug that brings me near To the childhood I lost, replaced by fear I used to think that the day would never come That my life would depend on the morning sun... I feel so extraordinary Something's got a hold on me I get this feeling I'm in motion A sudden sense of liberty The chances are we've gone too far You took my time and you took my money Now I fear you've left me standing In a world that's so demanding I used to think that the day would never come I'd see delight in the shade of the morning sun My morning sun is the drug that brings me near To the childhood I lost, replaced by fear I used to think that the day would never come That my life would depend on the morning sun...- New Order
/the dark cow of mystery\ i am in love with my own toe
So my fortune hold true. The girl left, and i got over it. I moved on. I found someone old, someone i had neglected, and she put me back into use. Then Angel came back.
/the dark cow of mystery\ I'm single. Again. Kate was there to comfort me, but she only delayed the sadness. A thousand clowns could not have fought off these dark clouds, but kate stood her ground, till she left me for her mother(today is mother's day). But at least i know she cares. So does Annika. Annika said i didn't need the excess baggage, and i guess she's right. I liked angel alot, but her father is a dirty bastard with guns, her friends for the most part are a bunch of horndogs and self-righteous sluts, and then there's Gordy. IT should never have happened. What gordy did was unforgivable. An man shouldn't do that, ever. I think i'm rationalizing my decision, but it's been made, and there's no going back. I called alisha, and asked her to keep an eye on angel, and she said she would and asked if we could still hang out. i said probably.
/the dark cow of mystery\ "sandy candy on a cold night" I'm excited. And the person i have to blame for this is none other than my brother, who comes from the great north tommorrow morning. Now this might not mean jack squat to yall (or it might make you think "oh no, there are TWO of them!"), but to me, it's like the freakin' pope's visiting. That's right, that guy with the big hat. I'm also going to see the one true love of my life tommorrow, Alisha's hundred and fifty pound dog, when i go with Angel to get my "skater" chain back from the psuedo~lesbian. How i came to loose it in the first place is a long and painful story full of biting, kicking, random visits, and a new person named Kerry(sp?), and thus, i will not tell it. Instead, i'll tell of the events of last eve that struck me as most memoriable. It all began after i got home from my spanish lesson with Karlos. I called the Kate from the land of Ire to see if she still wanted help with her math. She did, and said she'd be right over. During the fourty five minutes that it took her to travel the two blocks between our houses, Angel called. We talked about nothing and everything as we always do, and she eluded to making Kerry drive her over for a short visit. I told her that i couldn't say she could but that i wouldn't be sad if she did. As it turned out she did, and she bit me, I bit her, and hilarious biting and falling off of beds ensude. Katie and Kerrie just lay on top of the beds and poked us in the bum. The magical moment was broken when my parents got home. My dad sent me a look that sent A&K scurring out the door, and me and Katie back to studying. She's actually not that bad in math, but i'm not going to tell her that because she's my source for service hours(:P). In the end, bit Katie on the hand and sent her home. Good night.
/the dark cow of mystery\ You can be anything you want to be, as long as you do it in the shadows
/the dark cow of mystery\ In the distance sat a thousand men, each bandaged in his own way in, in his own place. Here one on the head, covering an eye, another on the elbow, drenched thouroghly with nervous sweat, and another with an empty pantsleg, safety pinned with care, and beside him a pale man with only a bloody shirt to show his wound, and so on and on went this mass of human wretchednes. Behind them lay the heaps of men who could not sit, lying in the shade of stoic oaks. And scattered about them all sat what remained of their weapons -splintered spears meant only for ceremonies, great bows whose only quarry were to be deer, bent shields -their heralds long since destroyed like the army they heralded, shattered swords blessed by the mark of the king, and well spent reapers that the had until recently been the tools that placed food on the tables of the empire. Here lay the greatest of the Leonan Guard, all maimed, and the meekest of the field, most slowly mingling with the earth. A thousand thousand years would not forget this defeat, or the deceit that that had lead to the fall of this, the greatest of the empires under the sun.
/the dark cow of mystery\ "f-----------k" I am at home, sitting alone in my basement, listening to the first half of an orb song(the rest is still downloading). Normally i'd be at school right now, but normally spring break starts on a tuesday and not a thursday(god bless you, dr colisimo). Juan diego was the only school in the valley in session on thursday, and that's including Judge and the lutheran high school. My relationship with Angel isn't going well, though it really isn't my fault, or even hers. The problem is the distance. I don't see her more than once a week -if i'm lucky- and the parents won't let me talk on the phone for more than fifteen minutes a day with her. I can't take this. ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! In less depressing news, i stared down a tongan twice my size. that's right. Oh yeah. I also tackled two others. Of course, i was playing football, but i still think i deserve a metal for it. a very big metal.
/the dark cow of mystery\ As i write this, i fight the pull of sleep on my eyelids. It was a big weekend, with much frueline(sp?) time, and i even spent time with others too! Hmmm... where to begin... Well the weekend started out like shyte. On friday i was sick(as previously mentioned), and i missed out on a really fun weekend with friends taking over a school. Instead it seemed that i was going to spend the weekend with my sisters screamingly insanely at me for things i couldn't control. then Katie called. She read the journal and it seemed like she was trying to cheer me up, but in reality, i think that she need cheering up as much as i did, so i figured that we could cheer each other up by playing checkers. then angel called. She was gonna hang out with the alisha and megan(a character not introduced) and wanted some "protection" from alisha's frolicking fingers. I said sure, but the mom said no on the grounds that katy was coming over. Oh how i cursed bying nice. in the end, i took katy to hang out with Alisha and Angel -megan had long gone when we arrived-. Angel and i said our hellos, Alisha became infatuated with the irish Kate, katy became intrigued by the Alisha -but not in that way-, and then A and I defiled the back of of katie's Cadillic. Oh lamentation. Oh well, katy still gets to break it in;). Katy drove me home, and i was late. today, sunday. I also hung out with the angel, alisha, and the katie too. We were going to the mall, but alisha was trapped at her church till three or so, so we hung out at her house for many hours. It was scary, A place full of small childrens toys, and that was just the closet. But it all ended up alright in the end.
/the dark cow of mystery\ "golden brown, texture like sun, lays me down, with might she runs, never a frown, with golden brown" -The stranglers 1st to plate toady is yes, that quote is wrong, but it's as right as i can remember. Hmm.. I'm at home today instead of at Conclave because Angel got me sick. Alisha gave Angel a cold, and angel gave me the sore throat. And i thought that it was a good thing to have a girl friend. Oh well... I feel very dark, like an unwanted sewer rat. I don't like being an unwanted sewer rat. of all things, to be an unwanted sewer rat is the worst. I remember when i was a favored white rat with pink eyes. those were the days, with the old table in the corner. competitions between Carrie and Derik over who could scream dirty words loudest without getting looks from other lunch tables. Kent's carrots, and Lisa's protein bars. This year gasn't been the joyious senior year every one speaks of. no money, no real jobs, just grouchy parents and distant or distance friends. oh well, at the sewer oves me still...
/the dark cow of mystery\ "on rain street"
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